Wednesday, 16 June 2010

Liar Liar, Pants on Fire

I don't really pour my heart and soul into my blog. I like the things in my life which are private to remain just that. So this blog will be a bit different to my other, rambling light-hearted entries.

Its fair to say I'm a very paranoid person and I hate the feeling that people are talking about me behind my back. So its understandable that I feel quite sick when someone tells me they themselves have been speaking about me to someone else. Worse when the things they are saying are lies.

Lord knows I'm not perfect. But -

I'm not an unreasonable jealous freak.
I'm not possessive.
I don't try and control people's friendships.
I'm not a bully.

It's sly to tell people things about me which I have said in confidence to the other person. Its plain disrespectful to tell them half the story. Perhaps it would be better to mention all the things they said, all the things they did...All of which I haven't mentioned to anymore. Silly me thinking the things that happen between two people stay that way . Storming out my house in a jealous rage because I was talking about one of my male friends. Telling me I was the only girl they could think about. Talking about a summer together. Spending alternate weekends together. Being told that no other girl even came close to me. Starting something again which they were 100% sure they wanted. Telling me they cannot stop thinking about me.

Conveniently forgets to leave this out their tale.

I don't think its fair to slander people when they don't have the opportunity to defend themselves.

I'm not a perfect person. I am far from it. I make countless mistakes everyday.
My biggest being falling for the same person over and over again, no matter how many times they dispose of me, they crook their finger and I can't help but run back. Not anymore.

It may seem petty to be writing this blog, and maybe it is.
But I won't be lied about. I won't be made to look like a freak who cannot let go. I won't be portrayed as an unreasonably jealous and possessive person. There are two sides to every story, and this time mine will be heard as well.

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